Sometimes I get lapses too.

Like how I tell myself not to buy any chocolates and then walk out of Coles with a brand new bar of Heaven.

just discovered this new toy! hence the rather artsy photos...hehehe. i now have something to distract me from my work. joy.

Through interpretive pictures.

Sooo Mel, how is it like to turn 21?








Erm...like that la.
But i'm optimistic about it.

Disassociation with the feelings of attachment.

i remember a conversation i had with my mom earlier this year. we were arguing about whether or not i should bring all these Lee Kum Kee sauces and dried anchovies, prawns etc over to Sydney. i told her that i'd rather use the extra weight to cart more clothes/memorabilia over because frankly (and i told her very frankly...i stared her in the eyes) i will never cook them. it would be a waste of money and space (and weight).


Andy's pippies a.k.a. la-la (the edible kind) which i was allowed to take home after the experiments to turn into a culinary delight.

3 months down the road and i'm kicking myself in the ass. i can't make soup because i have no dried ikan bilis and it's so bloody cut-throat expensive to buy the ones they sell in Chinatown. not to mention that they're NOT worth the price. so small and...ugly.


Onions, garlic, a little soya sauce and chinese wine. Steamed.
Marine biology has its perks.

and i'm still really surprised. not trying to boast here, but nothing that i've cooked has ever turned out to be a failure...although everything so far has been a result of trial-and-error and requiring efficient phone-networking back to Kajang to ask for cooking instructions and/or recipes. i'm quite proud. maybe i DO have the family's culinary genes after all. it was just..undiscovered.

and now that the winter's finally crunched down on us, i thought it was about time to bring out the good, warm and comforting doona! sleeping has risen to grand new heights of pleasure.



and as much as i love the warm sun and hot weather, i'm a little relieved that it's turning cold now. it just seems as though things are making a return to a season of normality. and what's better is that the advent of winter marks my already having stayed here for 3 months. heck, it's already the end of Week11 in uni...2 more weeks into this semester and i'll have completed 5/6 of my general tertiary education. sweet.

life's good...but it could be better. yet, i'm strangely satisfied for the meantime.

Tis the winter of our discontent...?
Nay, my friends...nay.

Come sit by me on the grass or on the sand by the sea.
Pass me one half of your headphones and share your songs with me.
And I promise you, I will fall in love.

Update!

Lately i've been experiencing lapses in my memory, of the short-term kind. and with each day, it gets worse and worse. i forget things like removing my pendrive from the library computer (it's currently sitting in Badham library..I HOPE!), what i was gonna buy at Coles, the time i'm supposed to meet my groupmates for our pre-presentation pep-talk, my lab book for marine bio, what insult i was about to hurl at xiang (the good kind), what i was supposed to pick up when i walk into my room...the examples go on.

after awhile, it just gets really frustrating.

i have my theories; it may be a sign of old age, or the fact that 99% of my brain cells are currently occupied with assignments and abstracts and excel spreadsheets, or maybe it's a way of my body retaliating towards the greater-than-normal influx of vegetables. i personally feel that the last theory holds the most weight.

and now i shall proceed to post pictures of what my life has been for the past few weeks. and by pictures of my life, i mean that they will be pictures of food which i've cooked up. because sadly, 50% of my life revolves around food and the dinner/lunch menu. i would've liked to post pictures of my assignments too...because that's where the remainder of my life currently lies...but then to take snapshots of my Word documents would truly be the pinacle of sadness.





I love mashed potatoes. Especially mashed potatoes swimming with gravy. But not as much as HOME-MADE mashed potatoes swimming in gravy (with a little help from Butter and Milk). positively delightful. and i know, the hong-dao-sui (red bean soup to everyone else) looks a bit sick...but trust me...it tastes fucking good. and i'm not saying that just because i boiled it myself. it DOES taste fucking good!

mmmm...hungry.

and there would've been much much more photos of food (considering i cook EVERY night)...but my housemate looks at me weird and laughs when i take any photos of it...and then i shy *blush*...therefore in order to foster and maintain the feelings of good will, i have resorted to taking photos only when she's not at home, or in her room, or in the shower. but the last two options are still risky, because my camera betrays me the moment i press the trigger. stupid clicky noise.

AND also...the following couple of pictures are for the girls: i saw (and tried and then subsequently bought) this corset which i personally think is mighty gorgeous! i'm completely in love with it! however, as you will soon see, i'll probably require some assistance from you guys girls...because wearing it can be a bit..ahhh..how should i put this..daunting? so, i shall need shit loads of help from you! yes you; Nikki, HY, Renren, Abby, TPL...and all the other ladies who read my blog and (will/might) go clubbing with me someday!

oh ya...and you too, mom..if none of them are around.




Isn't it gorgeous!? and now do you see why i describe it as daunting? doing up the ribbons were a bitch. but i still love it anyway. it's so English/Romantic...mmmm.

there are times when i feel like everyone around me is growing up and learning about the ways of the real world while i'm still stuck thinking we're all still kids. The time it really truly hit me was when you guys were talking about the stock market and all i could do was just sit back and try to make sense of it all.

because it is really scary when you guys know how to make money the adult way and i don't. and i honestly felt terribly lost when you were talking about stocks and bonds and exchange etc because i did not have a single fucking clue about what was going on. the only thing i knew was 'Unit Trust' and that's cos my mom kindly sat me down the day before and patiently explained what it was to me.

and i don't know if you knew how true your words were when you said guys guys i think we're boring mel...she looks darn blur...but they were damn true alright..!

i don't know about returns, i don't know about dividends, i don't know about investors and capital. sigh.

all i know is how to make clove-hitch knots, tie a secure hammock and catch a yabby without getting pinched by their damned claws. i know the ingredients needed to make a shot of Pink Pussy (the cat variety *koff*), i know why intertidal snails respire less in colder temperatures and i can give you a concise synopsis for The Odyssey.

but i know this is not enough. i still can't tell you what dividends are DAMNIT!

i don't think i'm ready to grow up and be an adult. i mean, godammit! i find no shame in performing out loud the shark story in Murni's! there is something quite wrong.

in need of an instrument.

I miss playing the piano and the feel of my fingertips hitting the cool smooth ivory keys. I miss that moment when you hit the right notes and the sound that conjures rings with clarity. I miss visually running over crotchets and quavers and knowing that i'm unknowingly two beats ahead. I miss that euphoric feeling you get after you've had a perfect and error-free performance.

I am not the enemy.
So you say.
Sure you're not, honey.

I thought that it was gone. Honestly. I thought I had buried it deep within my subconsciousness and to never let it surface. I admit, there were times where I had a relapse or two and there were instances when I spoke to others about it. But it was unintentional and if I could forget it, I promise you I would. But it's not something you can just forget, after all, I did invest quite some time into it. And now, you've come again and taken a hold on me like you did before.

Naruto shippuuden (did I spell that right?!)

You will be my downfall!!! such perfect timing to re-enter my life too.

i was trying to compile some photos of us for this post and i got myself terribly mixed-up and confused because i couldn't remember what year was which...and then it struck me that we've known each other for quite some time now...time enough for me to be confounded by the chronology of our past events!

time sure passes fast, ms siah...as fast or maybe faster than the currents underfoot above.

and here i am once again wishing you a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY! your 21st, to be exact. somehow i feel as though the past year has drawn us so much closer than before therefore here's a toast to you and to the memories we've shared!

being rudely awoken by a monkey jumping on OB's hot staff quarters' tin roof
carving up a pork knuckle

listening cautiously to someone saying she saw 'something' during solo camp (turned out to be a tortoise/frog)

getting callouses on our fingers courtesy of Camp5

performing the 'shark story' in Murni's

gushing with excitement at Blue Mountains

laughing at Xiang and Amin performing a pseudo Lion Dance with the tent sheet
cooking beehoon with fishballs at 3a.m.

admiring the sillhouette of KLCC within a semi glass box

watching Eugene battle it out with Luna Bar's staff for our RM50

wishing each other a Happy New Year after the fireworks have ended

Adult status..OMG!
once again, happy birthday renren!

I like the Aussie sunsets.

you know how when you've done too much work that you've actually overdid it and then the few days after the completion of it all, you just feel so demotivated and spirit-spent?

like you just don't care anymore?

uh-huh.
even though they still keep coming in.

Knackered and Warrah.

i am so very tired. in the span of 7 days i have handed in 5 reports, 2 research proposals, attended a field trip and given a presentation. the amount of work thrown at us is insane...i tell myself that the worst has passed and that it can only go uphill from here, but i secretly know that salvation will only come in July.

AHHH! damn you Sydney University! if i had wanted so much work thrown at me i'd have done architecture or..or..aeronautical engineering! i'm a marine biologist DAMN IT! all we do is chase after dolphins and lie in the sun..!!! GET YOUR DAMNED FACTS RIGHT!

So anyway, back to the field trip: it was a 3-day-2-night affair to Warrah, which is about 2 hours north of Sydney. We were supposed to conduct a self-designed experiment and in the case of my group, our aim was to see if variations in water temperature would have an effect on the metabolic rate of organisms found in the tide pools. So essentially we spent the 3 days chasing after a species of marine snails called Nerita. Very cute.

And i'm loving Warrah so so much..i'm missing it already!!! bah..i wish i didn't have to come home. i really really really wouldn't mind staying there for a whole week just chasing after snails and seastars and getting salt spray on my face.

Pictures, after which i plan to hermit-ise my self and do battle with the ever-growing number of reports.




These are my group members: Emily-with-the-red-bucket and Nick on top, Hunt-y and Samantha with me. We are the snail-chasers.



This is the room in which we stayed in. The field station did not have enough rooms or beds to accommodate all of us, and since we were the last group to arrive, we were room- and bedless. then someone came up with a brilliant idea for all 5 of us to crash in the living room, so there you have it, mattresses and pillows on the floor and a seemingly never-ending slumber party.




The rock platform where we collected our samples. i positively cannot get enough of that place because it was just TEEMING with marine animals. i get terribly excited when i see a seastar.

Young Scientists At Work.





We had to calibrate and test out our thermo-sensor before we ventured out into the field for fear it might fuck up our experiment. The highest record for temperature of breath stands at 35degC..just so you know.



And of course, presenting Nerita!



Check out its cute little feelers! I really miss my snails...*gloom*.



Best field trip EVER..!