There is a subset of Australians who are young, male, commonly found wearing a singlet with a generic baseball cap, and commonly referred to as bogans. These men often exhibit the following in public: excessive bravado, excessive high-fiving, excessive testosterone, hooting, shouting, shoving, fighting and braying laughter.

Tonight, i had the misfortune of crossing paths with a whole pack of them (5), stuffed inside a white Holden station wagon (how i wish I'd gotten a hold of their number plate now). Things seemed pretty innocent at first; i was waiting for the pedestrian light to turn green, they were being rowdy inside their car, the car turns left and hello, i find myself ice-cream bombed (it was thrown out of the backseat window, hit my thigh and splat on the ground) by a half-eaten softserve vanilla cone most likely purchased from Maccas.

The bogans are laughing like hyenas congratulating themselves on a job well done while driving away in their getaway car and staring at me for a reaction. I look at them, flipped both fingers and called them cunts (HELLO). They drive off into the distance.

Upon hindsight, i guess i shouldn't have called them cunts. It could've been dangerous. Maybe assholes would've been a better choice. Because assholes are all around us, especially if they are young male bogans. I'm pretty sure me being a female Asian made me a prime target for them. But you know what? Fuck it. One day I'll be earning AUD 100 000 per annum and they will still be driving around 5-to-a-car in their fucking singlets and caps, eating softserve ice-cream and generally being white trailer trash (yup, they were white).

What's a little ice-cream?

And anyway, I've already prayed to God that they'll get into an accident tonight which will hopefully leave them all crippled and impotent. God listens to prayers so I'm all good.