I am a scientist not a murderer.

on monday, i had to wake up at 5.50 a.m. in order to make it into uni at 6.30 to meet everyone else so that we could go down to Wollongong together for a conference. that was by far the earliest i've ever had to wake up this whole year. anyway, as i was walking into uni, i passed all these houses that were darkened with their blinds and curtains shut, and realised that every house i passed had at least someone who was still asleep inside of it. it felt a little strange, but not in a i'm-so-jealous-they-get-to-sleep-while-i'm-awake sort-of way, but more like an oh-wow-they're-asleep-and-i'm-awake way.

it felt weirdly nice to think that i was one of a very few souls who were walking through a sleeping world.

anyway, we arrived at Wollongong and the patron for the science conference was this really old scientist who had Parkinson's disease. it was really hard watching this man give a talk to a room full of young able-bodied healthy people, and there he was, hands shaking viciously and body trembling the entire time. seeing him ravaged by this disease yet still plowing strong with his work and passion really made me think about issues like getting old; i don't want to get old and i don't want to (probably) have to suffer like he did. and then, seeing him made me feel ashamed, because, obviously i'm not as dedicated to science as i thought i was. i know for a fact that if i were struck down by parkinson's, i wouldn't be standing in front of an auditorium full of people, giving a speech about what current and future scientists would have to do to advance in research.

i digress. but those were the main thoughts playing in my head all week. i taught 60 students today in rotations of 12 students per time about urchins, how they spawn and fertilise, and their outer and inner anatomy. now my fingers smell like urchin death and are dyed purple by the pigments. also, i poked myself in the thumb with a hypodermic needle and now there's a big hole in it and blood won't stop gushing out. ok i lied, it's stopped gushing. HAPPY DAYS.

'Tis the winter of my discontent

today is the first day of July and i am stunned by the fact that more than half the year has gone by. i feel like 2010 is probably the shortest year that i've ever lived - usually years speed by me quickly, but at least i still manage to keep track of it. how is it that this year has snuck by me without my realising it?

i blame Antarctica. i blame Antarctica because it has completely screwed up my perception of annuallity (yes, that is a legitimate word even though there's a dotted red line below it - it IS a word). Antarctica decided to wedge it's big ugly self into my mental calendar, right where the old year was about to end, and the new year was about to begin, and it screwed me up. i feel like i have been robbed, cheated, scammed and flaked off my allotted, and rightly entitled 365 days of the year.

i had big plans for 2010. now, the only plan that is in the cards for me is: a) work, b) find money, and c) pay rent. yes, i have just extricated myself from the looming shadows of potential debt, financial distress and nightly meals of bread-and-butter sandwiches - but no fear, i am now happily and gainfully employed again. not only has Antarctica wiped out my perception of annuallity (the fact that i've used it twice now, and will continue to use it again and again, reinforces its eligibility as a word), it has also drained my bank account, in the form of un-lived-in rent. yes, i have decided that my whole life shall now be dedicated to paying rent.

but i digress.

i STILL, and will NEVER, believe how fast time flies. the rate at which it is going, i am afraid that, by the time i die, i won't even know that i'm dead, because i'd be so busy catching up with 'life'. i shall now leave you with the wise words from Ben Gibbard - on his philosophy of time, as well as a few captured memories of what i've been up to. good day.

"I knew the years would move quickly
But never quite as fast as this
So bring the discrepancies, I'll pour the drinks"