It's so easy to lose track of time - or maybe, losing track of time isn't an accurate enough description of what is happening now. What I meant to say is that it's so easy to lose track of life.



It's been a month since I left Malaysia and I still occasionally dream of my time spent at home. It was particularly bad when I was on the Aurora on my way down to Davis. Every night, I would have very vivid dreams about being at home - nothing too exciting, just dreams of me sitting on one of an endless supply of plastic chairs in one out of an endless supply of roadside mamak stalls. In front of me would be something that could pass for any generic type of roti, accompanied by a generic sort of teh o ais limau.



Nothing too exciting - just the sort of life that I have missed for quite a while now.



It feels surreal to be back in Davis for a third time. For the life of me, I'd never imagined that I would be doing three forays into the barren south the first time I set foot on this chilly continent. Isn't it strange where the tides of Life take you while you're not paying attention? I never wanted this, or rather, it wasn't something that I had planned for for ages, or something that I had wished for or hoped for to happen all my life. It just...happened. I guess I must really be lucky despite my usual pessimistic self telling me otherwise.



I don't want to sound like a traitor to Kajang, or an institutionalised psycho - but coming back to Davis really does feel like coming home, in a sense. Stepping onto the sea-ice straight off the ship, trudging up the main hill leading up to the station buildings, casting my eyes on the icebergs out by the horizon - I still recognise a few of them from my very first trip. It is amazing how well these icebergs put up a fight with the ravages of seasons past, blizzards and scathing winds. Everything about this place seems to echo 'HELLO! It's YOU again!' - it feels odd, because I don't belong here, yet, in a very weird way, I feel like I do.



It feels good to be back. And already, I can feel Life snatching away each precious minute that I have here. Back then, I would have been quite upset, but it doesn't really matter anymore. Three times was more than I'd ever hoped for.



I guess Antarctica can be summed up by these two quotes - though polar opposites of each other, but absolutely, absolutely true to the essence of this place.



"First you fall in love with Antarctica,
and then it breaks your heart"
- Kim Stanley Robinson

"Great God! This is an awful place"
- Robin Falcon Scott, Antarctic explorer
who died in pursuit of the south pole.

There's nothing I wouldn't give for a bowl of this RIGHT NOW.