I just realised...

Dah lama aku tak ber-emo.

. . .

I admit...during the first few months after the conception of this blog, i fervently hoped that it would gain an astronomical readership like those that KennySia and Xiaxue were garnering. I've always liked to write and being incredibly narcissistic (but only occasionally), i have always taken great pleasure when someone compliments me on a particularly good piece of work.

It's been more than a year now, and my readership HAS increased. But before you roll your eyes, shake your head and mutter..."Damn perasan la you, mel"...i can explain. Ok, so maybe the readership hasn't grown to astronomical heights..but there are now sufficient readers to make me feel uncomfortable..i can't really write about a lot of things now. because of some people. and i especially hate it when someone goes...'oh hey..! i read your blog..quite interesting..' and my reaction would be .. 'oh shit..did i ever diss him/her on it???'

maybe i should start learning how to block ip addresses. or change to livejournal or something. or just delete this damned thing.

but cannot. i sayang it too much.

. . .

BaH!

how la? to type or not to type?

. . .

Ah fuck it.

. . .

bahbahbah..! sometimes i hate it here. ok..not sometimes. most of the times. i hate having to wake up at 6.30 in the morning for classes. i hate having to take the 1-hour bus trip into the city. i hate having to pay AUD30 a week in transportation fees. i hate having to switch buses from QVB to the city and looking out for those pesky transport officers (because i'm currently ripping off their system, that's why). i hate how i have to think twice and doubly hard whenever i want to buy something...even if it's food. i hate how everyone's so much taller than me. i hate the weather. i hate those fucking ABCs in uni and their trying-too-hard-to-be-white-bois-and-girls attitude. i hate their accents. i hate their brown-near-death Gum trees. i hate this drought. i hate how everyone keeps calling me about assignments, tutorial times, lecture times, notes etc. i hate the biased australian news. i hate Home & Away. i hate not being able to commit myself to ANYTHING because i'll be leaving this damned place in a year's time. i hate hate hate it all!

fuh.

the only redeeming points that sydney have are the AMAZING bands who come this way. the fact that my nephews and cousins are here. the beautiful beaches. the awesome hiking tracks in Blue Mountains. their fantastic Victorian architecture. and their wide range of flowers.

. . .

see pretty pictures of flowers. calm yourself down.

. . .

oh man..that was darn vitriolic-like.

but i feel so much better.