Week 25: Emails I hate receiving.

i seem to have developed a fear, or phobia if you will, of checking my university email account - especially the one linked to the department of anatomy. i used to check it religiously because maria would ALWAYS have an email in there waiting for me with new instructions on what to do. seven months on, and now that enthusiasm has dwindled, and i'll even go as far as to say that it has sunk into the deepest depths of the deepest oceans never to resurface again!

honest to almighty god, i literally have to FORCE myself to key my username and password to sign into the anatomy domain. each time i start typing ji-- my fingers start weeping and pleading for me to stop.

when i don't see an email from her, i sigh a great big sigh of relief. the WHOOOOOSH-AHHH kind that completely empties your lungs, lightens your head and brings joy to your soul. but when i see a mail from her, i cringe, my heart drops to the ground, my breathing becomes shallow and i rant against God, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!

it is so bad. so bad. and i'm only all too glad that i have 66 days before i hand in my final thesis and 73 days before i give my final presentation. oh yes. i counted. just a little over two more months! URGE ME ON!