As promised.

As vain/arrogant/whatever as it may sound, i never really expected so many people to read my blog...although i DO know the possibility of my readership being a grand total of 20 and somehow they just like to refresh my page ever so often in a day, hence the hits that are being generated.

Before this, when i first started, i knew..or rather, i thought that it'd be safe to blog about anything..just because i'd only given out the address to a selected few. but somehow, the selected few gradually grew..and now..i feel as though there's this invisible censorship that comes with the whole package.

notably, my mom reads this, sometimes..also my cousins, an auntie..maybe more..i don't know..they like surprising me like that...so expletives should be kept to the barest minimum. and also...lovey-dovey stories...cannot simply supply my mom the information for free..must make her grovel a bit for it.

and then, of course, there's many many other factors to consider..like how much is too much? or, heck-do-i-really-wanna-write-it-down-and-let-him-read-it? ok..this was just a general statement, but sometimes, i wish i hadn't told you about the blog. haha..too late. i wish i could be bolder, more devil-may-care, but ultimately i shrink away...embarassment plays a big role...also the thought of satisfaction not on my part but maybe yours...cannot. my heads says CANNOT and by now you should be rather familiar with that aspect which governs my actions.

so what do i do when i need to release emotions, yet can't be stuffed to write it in a diary, cos at the end of the day, i want an audience to witness these feelings...but an audience that i do not know, and vice versa, personally... i'd rather they knew me just through my words.

enter the secret BLOG! hehehe..by now, you should know that i only mean to antogonize you.

maybe one day i might have the courage to post up what i want when i want without a single care about what response it might generate. cos maybe by that time, i'd be so desensitized that i wouldn't care anymore. I don't care so I shall post. but right now, i still care so i post carefully.

heh.

ok...wtf...ranting. tired. sleepy. GOING TO THE BEAUTIFUL GIRLS GIG TMRW AND THEN HOPPING IN TO 3 WISE MONKEYS BAR WITH MARS2007 PEEPS!

wouldn't anonymity be so fun?

oh yes..i figured, to celebrate the sort-of end of assignments till Saturday.


Obligatory poser pic

And since there's all these SALES signs flashing around the city...i figured, heck, i'm generous..so see one get one free..


Complimentary poser pic

I realise now how much i love the lights from the bathroom...EXCELLENT LIGHTING without the need for flash...and i've rediscovered the therapeutic values of camwhoring...

Just a thought:

What would you have wanted me to say,

when you put me in a spot like that?