of departures, ghosts and men...and maybe a frog too

5 DAYS my time

today, i would've had stepped into the Sydney International and Domestic Airport for the 6th time this year. it seems a heck of a lot of times, and i'm still scratching my head trying to figure out how i arrived at the grand total. but i will scratch my head no longer and accept the fact that in less than a week's time, it'll be my 7th and last time entering the airport for the year AD2005.

the first time would, of course, have been the time when i first arrived in Sydney exactly 9 months ago to this very date. the whole affair had been, rather, warped for me. i left KL just the night before, expecting to cry buckets and buckets and yet, i held my composure, willing myself not to let on any bit of emotion...melanie ho doesn't cry easily, and i didn't want to be yet another statistic in the Great Count of People who Cried at Airports. but sad i was, and sad i felt. and when i reached sydney, i had to steel myself once more to accept the fact that this would be what i'd have to call home for the next 9-odd months.

then of course, the next couple of times were to send off my dad followed by my mom. once again, tears evaded me. i truly and mightily amazed myself at the so-called lack of emotion i felt...i thought this would be it, this would truly wrench at least a single drop of tear from my eyes...but, they did their job well in hiding my emotions. i took it with a smile, told them not to worry about me and watched as they turned their backs away from me as they walked into the Departure Lounge.

yet later, it was again, another send off of a friend of May's..Alex. at this point, i began wondering when it'd be my turn...for me to be the one waving at people with whilst i walked into the Departure Lounge and not the other way around. oh well...my time would come. one day.

finally, a break through the clouds. for the first time ever, i picked someone up from the airport, Linda. no more waving.

but breaks only come once...more often than not, it is the parting that dominates the world we live in...not the coming-together. so there i was, saying good bye to Uncle Cheong and family. this time, i was indifferent. i did not feel that sense of 'when will it be my turn?'...all i knew was that in a week's time, i'd get my chance to turn back and wave before disappearing into the Departure Lounge.

...it's insane, i know...

on a lighter note:

for the first time in 9 months, i read a Malaysian Newspaper! yes..it was the Grand Malay Mail, humble, doesn't really have great comics, and definitely not news-report worthy like The Star. but heck, it's a Malaysian newspaper and that makes it a GOOD THING in itself.

i just realised how out of date i am with the ongoings in Malaysia. what little news that i know of it has been kindly passed on by my parents or friends. and when i say little, i actually mean minuscule. and when i say minuscule, i actually mean, maybe 3 pieces of new altogether...which i can clearly tell you...

1. Haze affects Malaysia.
2. Death of PM's wife, Endon.
3. Capture-Release-Recapture of some chinese undergound king pin (thanks to aforementioned Malay Mail)

sounds like one of the biological experiments for dating the population of a species...Capture-Mark-Release-Recapture... hahahaha...oh tell me that you've heard of it!

yep...that's is basically all i know. if you think i know more, correct me now! i don't want to seem like such a frog-beneath-a-coconut-husk (for the benefit of my non-malay-speaking-rellies)

yes...and there was an article about ghosts, ghoulies, spirits and all things nasty in the newspaper too...in conjunction with Halloween. so yes, i read the article past the pontianak, the langsuir and the penanggalan and then i got the heebie-jeebies and threw the paper down...i couldn't venture further anymore... see? the damn thing still has an effect on me even though i'm miles away...geez.

maybe i'll continue reading it tomorrow...in bright daylight...surrounded by everyone else in Cherrybrook.

yes.

i think i'll do that.

and if you're wondering why i have so much time blogging and not studying...well...i'm at the point where i'm just indifferent. hey...it's just 3 more days before i'm done. gimme a break, will ya?