when shades of black and white turn grey...

blog surfing has taught me one thing...you'll find yourself pleasantly surprised when you come upon little gems of thoughts in which each word completely frames what you wanna say, but can't put out in words...kudos to the Smart Aunty!

"misunderstanding happens. but that doesn't give you the right to use it as a shield. or worse, a weapon. it's not a bad thing to be selfish. but then again, think of others before you get too self-absorbed. because, at the end of the day, the conclusion might contradict the hypothesis. and if it really does, i pity you, who caused the whole hoo-ha, and those who lent a helping hand.

because experience taught me not to judge by my presumption. "

i've been thinking about it the whole day. and although i acknowledge that i may have been insensitive, and for that i take all the blame...but i was really REALLY hurt by what you said to me.

you said that all i ever did was make dumbass-crack-insensitive jokes without thinking or making sense..i spent the whole day reviewing the jokes i've made, and that's the only one time that was remotely 'insensitive'.

you said that whenever you talked to me, all i ever did was make you angry...because i don't make sense.

well, here's what i think. i think i should be given free-reign on making and voicing my opinions even though it may or may not be insensitive. if you think it's insensitive, tell me nicely instead of jumping straight down my throat and i'll accept that i was wrong and respect your judgement.

from where i see it now...you've not only screwed me but also whatever foundation that our friendship was built on...if all i ever did was just to make you angry then i'm sorry. the friendships that i make, build and mould so whole-heartedly aren't meant to antagonize any one individual...if you think that all i ever did was make you angry, then i'll pull out now...no point having one angry person and another wondering what the hell went wrong.

i don't want to be the pot here but the many times when you were teasing me which bordered upon actual insulting wasn't very sensitive either and even more so when you ganged up with another person...but did i take offence? all i did was smile and laugh it off, because i knew you were my friend, and i knew it was all a joke...

i wish you could see beyond the self-righteous-holier-than-thou attitude that you've built around yourself and see that we're all capable of doing anything that you've labelled as 'insensitive'.

my last thought before i end?

i just wanna say, nice going...you managed to screw me and our friendship in one night...that's an amazing feat.