Week 18: Me and my mouth. And tongue.

when i was a kid, i ate chicken and only chicken. sometimes, i would have the occasional fish or prawn...but most times, it was chicken. after awhile, my parents gave up. i got to eat a lot of chicken rice, which was nice. and kfc. and, err, more chicken rice...roasted, not steamed - i like the crispy skin.

life was good. and then i grew up.

i have now become more tolerant of food which i once found abhorrent (i.e. all forms of vegetables and tofu). pork is excellent when it's presented to me in the form of char siew, siew mai or Hurricane's ribs. roast duck, despite its meat being a weird grey-purplish colour, is the next best thing since sliced bread.

ANYWAY, in the past 7 months i've found myself opening up to new cuisine! i eat sashimi now! i know! RAW FISH! i still remember the days when i'd give waiking and hongyin a lot of flak for eating sashimi (you know...before fire was discovered, people used to eat sashimi). all the sexually-charged moans they emitted when sashimi touched tongue (oohhhhhhhhhhh my goddd..it melts in your mouth) fell to deaf ears. but now, NOW, i understand what you guys were on about! I LOVE SALMON SASHIMI TOO!

and not only do i eat sashimi now, i also eat raw oysters! yes, i know! RAW OYSTERS! i used to wrinkle up my nose in disgust when i saw my mom squeeze lemon juice over it before proceeding to slurp the grey mass down her throat (you know...an oyster comprises of one quarter shit, one quarter meat and one half eggs/sperm!). i mean, hey i know my stuff ok? i'm a marine biologist. but now, NOW, i slurp down oysters with a squeeze of lemon and a pinch of salt like there's no tomorrow! no wonder they say that oysters are aphrodisiacs because when you eat one it's like having an orgasm in your mouth la! (note: don't believe me? ask the Smexy Anonymous Auntie. when i saw her facial expression after she'd pop one in her mouth, i didn't know if she hated it or loved it - much like how i imagine all faces undergoing an orgasm would look like. i don't know. i'm just taking a wild, blind shot).

i do believe that my tastebuds are honing themselves to the taste of more and more expensive cuisine.

the fun's not over yet. not only do i now eat sashimi AND oysters, i've also taken to drinking coffee! I KNOW! WHAT THE FUCK RIGHT?! i used to be a strong proponent against the consumption of coffee, but i think i'm slowly starting to morph over to the dark side (or rather, conforming to societal pressures). you see, there's this coffee shop place (coffee shop sounds very cina apek kopi o tamau gula kasi satu!) near where i stay and it's rumoured to be serving the best coffee you can ever find in sydney! now, that's a very big call to make - so naturally, i've gone around the place a couple of times to check if that call is true. i don't drink coffee so i have nothing to compare notes with, but it's not bad. it's pretty good actually.

so there i was yesterday (4 p.m. Australian EST), sitting inside campos (the name of the shop) because my cousin had asked me to buy some coffee beans. and i thought to myself, hey why not bring my papers there to read sambil minum kopi? i ordered an affogato (a shot of espresso over vanilla ice-cream) and since i was being adventurous, it became a double-shot affogato. haha. i know right? but because i was so into the affogato, i finished it in 10 minutes, tops. that meant that i couldn't sit around campos anymore because i've got nothing to warrant me taking up a table! so, i ordered a mocha as an excuse to hog the table longer. and it was bloody good too.

first let me tell you, my body is NOT in any way used to caffeine. two hours post-affogato and mocha, i started feeling strange. hmmm...heartbeat rate increasing. breathing becomes shallower and faster. shit, don't tell me i have emphysema? oh dear, my hand is twitching wtf is going on?! feeling. very. restless. hey, why do i suddenly feel like screaming? why am i nodding my head from side to side? is it my hormones?? hmmm, better lie down for a bit. fuck, i hope this twitching stops soon.

needless to say, i had the worst sleep of my life. i thought there were ghosts hiding in my bathroom. i heard this strange popping noise. it was too hot under my comforter. i felt like how i assume a crack-addict would feel like coming down from a trip. it was terrible. and when i finally managed to fall asleep, i dreamt someone threw a rat trap at me WITH A RAT INSIDE.

how exciting. i'm actually contemplating on going back to campos tomorrow. is this how people eventually become addicted to coffee?